Bigfoot Calculator

A few years ago one sleepy Saturday afternoon I found myself sitting around my apartment. I didn't have much to do, and Silverdale, WA isn't exactly known as a high energy, singles-driven hot spot. Then all of a sudden, some show on TV came on dealing with Sasquatch and there I found myself- in the heart of Bigfoot territory watching a documentary about this hairy, elusive and mythical being.

I month later, I spoke with a woman who owned Rainier Overland Lodge as a few of us were passing through on a Rainier summit climb. Over Chicken Fried Steak, she told three of us that as a little girl she and her brother had gone out one night with a pair of homemade plywood feet, tromped around her neighbors yard and then headed to bed. Much to their shock and pleasure, the next day their footprints made it onto the front page of the local paper.

Armed with this knowledge and a whole lot of time on my hands, I decided to insert tangible, cold hard numbers into the dialogue- at the very least to satiate my own curiosity. Cryptozoologists insist that Bigfoot is real. Can their belief be supported? Despite the fact that no body, skeleton, hair patch or realistic image has come forth. Despite urban sprawl, satellite technology and an amazing amount of logging in the Pacific Northwest. Despite every eyewitness encounter always followed up by some goofball with no teeth insisting that "after hearing a bloodthirsty scream" and then seeing an 800 lb "thing" staring directly at them, they always, always, always run right toward the sighting.. instead of Mach 4 in the opposite direction.

So, I came up with the Bigfoot Calculator. Can Cryptozoologist claims be empirically supported? There are assumptions in the below and I did my best to identify those as made. Enjoy.

The Bigfoot Calculator

Average Bigfoot height of 7'10" and weight (lbs) of 650, Bipedal Hominid. This means that caloric calculations most closely resemble humans in burn curves which based on height/weight increase at an ever increasing rate. Average Bigfoot Physical Characteristics: http://www.bfro.net/gdb/show_FAQ.asp?id=585

When you look at the caloric burn for an individual with the above characteristics, you get the following:
Average Calorie burn/day for biped at 650 lbs, resting (basal): 7,076
Average Calorie burn/day for ~10 hrs light to moderate activity: 1,769
Calorie burn derived from: http://www.stevenscreek.com/goodies/calories.shtml

All articles I have read speak of Bigfoot walking for "scores" of miles/ day. Average Calorie burn/ day for 40 miles (score=20, so minimum score(s)= 40) of walking for a 650 lb biped: 18,575
- Assumption that walking speed is 4.5mph for 10 hrs to cover 40 miles: http://www.caloriesperhour.com/index_burn.php

Bigfoot is identified as omniverous. However, in order to consume 18,575 calories a day, more than huckleberries and pine cones will need to be consumed for high calorie, dense energy meals. Several sources identify the Red Squirrel as Bigfoot's preferred food source.

An average Red Squirrel is low in fat, similar to rabbits. This means that the caloric content is lower in fat burning energy and only has a 541 calorie value.
http://www.calorie-count.com/calories/item/17184.html

One Bigfoot burning 18,575 calories/day would need to consume 34.334 squirrels to sustain daily caloric burn. Assumption is made that Red Squirrels are literally jumping into Bigfoot's hands to be consumed and that no extra calories are being burned chasing those zippy little critters around the forest floor.

Calculating out and rounding down to 34 avg/day, one Bigfoot would then need to consume 12,410 Red Squirrels/year.

Minimum Viable Population (MVP) in order to sustain an independent species and maintain genetic diversity that does not result in an unacceptable rate of inbreeding is commonly identified as 50. Yes, smaller MVPs are proven to exist. But genetic bottlenecks can nail a species just as easily as external, uncontrolled events and can quickly result in species extinction. For example: if all 10 Bigfeet were hanging out on Mt St Helens northern slopes for a town hall meeting to discuss what to do about all the hoaxers with plywood feet on May 18th, 1980 they'd be screwed. So we'll run with 50 for the Bigfoot Calculator.
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Minimum_viable_population

12,410 Red Squirrels/year * 50 Bigfoot (Bigfeet?): 620,500/ year across Bigfoot population

620,500 squirrels year. Yah. Big shocker no Bigfoot has been discovered.

Back to Main: http://territoryahead.blogspot.com/